2016 PRESIDENTIAL DERBY
Daily Racing RagThe Daily Racing Rag
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TOP BUN EPISODE 7: IOWA PIGS FOR TRUMP To make certain he could leverage his influence in this farm state Top Bun literally buys the farm and convinces many thousands of pigs to trust him which they in turn do in a desperate audacious and hopeful fantasy that somehow someway they would be spared their inevitable fate.
TOP BUN EPISODE 7: IOWA PIGS FOR TRUMP
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FEEL THE BERN When a group of Bernie Sanders for President volunteers return to their Des Moines campaign headquarters from a rural Iowa farm county fundraising event and spicy carnitas dinner catered by migrant slaughterhouse workers questions arise as to why everyone's penis feels like an overheated nuclear fusion rod.
FEEL THE BERN
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DONALD DUCKS DEBATE Donald Duck makes his first on-screen performance since a 1995 cameo in THE GOOFY MOVIE. Here Donald plays an angry politician who storms out of an important political debate after being mocked over his duck feathers and lack of pants by a fox moderator who also accuses him of political quackery.
DONALD DUCKS DEBATE
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TOP BUN EPISODE 6 - THE DERBY FAVORITE Donald Trump a.k.a. Top Bun loans out his Grade I home bred New York filly also named Top Bun to a wealthy Iowa Derby horse breeder to gain goodwill and a competitive edge. Trump becomes fond of saying if he were a thoroughbred race horse he'd want a stud date with Top Bun too.
TOP BUN EPISODE 6 - THE DERBY FAVORITE
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CALL TO FARMS action game by BERNIE SANDERS REVOLUTION In this new electronic game Bernie as your avatar seeks out votes from Iowa farm owners and workers but you must work around the facts that the largest farms are owned by multi-national corporations and a majority of the laborers are Spanish-speaking non-voters.
CALL TO FARMS action game by BERNIE SANDERS REVOLUTION
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SHE'S A RAINBOW Hillary visits the International Pavilion Room during the World Family Conference and greets representatives of every ethnic race on earth using phrases from eleven different languages. The addition of an extraordinary group of soulful backup singers smooths her tones and makes her words flow like gospel music.
HILLARY CLINTON - SHE'S A RAINBOW
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HEY DUDE - REVOLUTION by the BERNIE EDM masterclass DJ "The Bernie" has released new dance tracks on the MSDNC record label. Highly anticipated, this is his first new music since his smash hit FEEL THE BERN. In HEY DUDE he calls out billionaires to support street musicians and REVOLUTION is a dance-a-thon marathon.
HEY DUDE - REVOLUTION by the BERNIE
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BUTTERFLIES AND ZEBRAS AND MOONBEAMS AND FAIRY TALES Bernie visits the high country of Candyland Iowa and finds a cornucopia of color and form and fantasy as butterflies and zebras bask in moonbeams. The friendliest folks dress in their favorite fairy tale character's costume and Nanny Narcan is nearby if needed.
BUTTERFLIES AND ZEBRAS AND MOONBEAMS AND FAIRY TALES
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TRUSTED - THE WINGNUT WAGER OF WALL STREET When campaigning in his current home state of Texas an eager presidential candidate played by Ted Cruz likes to brag that Texans have balls of brass and the nation's cheapest gas but when he came to woo the wealthy wizards of Wall Street his ballgame was all spit and polish.
TRUSTED - THE WINGNUT WAGER OF WALL STREET
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BERNIE SANDERS IN STEERED When out of control Wall Street bulls ran amok and stampeded the American economy into a box canyon most common sense rural state folks knew exactly what had to be done. When you have too many bulls you need to make steers. In this new film Bernie plays an old country vet who does just that.
BERNIE SANDERS IN STEERED
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SARAH PALIN IN ANGEL FROM HELL Sarah Palin is back on TV in a new weekly sitcom and things are off to a terrific start. After swooping in like a guardian angel to endorse the Donald Trump candidacy in Iowa Palin blows the roof off the auditorium with a jaw-dropping entrance in her Victoria Secret angel wings costume.
SARAH PALIN IN ANGEL FROM HELL
SARAH PALIN IN ANGEL FROM HELL Sarah Palin is back on TV in a new weekly sitcom. After finishing her speech a sky-high Sarah is so excited to be back in the game she leaps on The Donald, who without pausing to take a pill or go to the bathroom, expresses his gratitude in a prolonged and raunchy spontaneous display of affection.
SARAH PALIN ENDORSES TRUMP
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SANDERS FAMILY FEUD Bernie Sanders was 39 years old when his beloved Uncle Harland Sanders from a complicated extended family relationship died in 1980 but Bernie still fondly remembers vigorously discussing politics and competing economic ideologies over a delicious 12-piece family bucket of fried chicken with all the fixings.
SANDERS FAMILY FEUD
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HE'S GOTTA HAVE IT Donald Trump continues his efforts to win over African-American voters by offering a free 3-piece dinner to any voting-age black adult wearing a 2016 Trump badge or sign. Spike Lee directs and films as they discuss how Trump's alienation of 90% of Latino voters makes attracting black voters an urgent necessity.
HE'S GOTTA HAVE IT
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ACADEMY OF TRUMP TRUMP AWARDS 2016 Being a billionaire has it's advantages in politics. In an attempt to woo black voters Top Bun buys the Academy Awards, nominates for best film "Straight Outta Compton" and establishes separate but equal categories for black actors. Critics were not pleased with the ballsy trophy redesign.
ACADEMY OF TRUMP TRUMP AWARDS 2016
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BERNIE SANDERS - THRILLER This new film gets to the heart of why Bernie Sanders is doing so well. Going back over 30 years Sanders organized his first Halloween street dance inspired by the Michael Jackson video. He gradually recognized a revolution could be born if a majority of the people would just work (dance) together.
BERNIE SANDERS - THRILLER
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ALTERNATE UNIVERSE VIRTUAL REALITY - SECOND LIFE THIRD WIFE Now you can live like a billionaire but first you'll have to spend almost four grand to own one of the nifty Alternate Universe Virtual Reality (AUVR) headsets. Donald Trump tried the product and opined "Terrific, but what the hell do I need this for? I already live here."
ALTERNATE UNIVERSE VIRTUAL REALITY - SECOND LIFE THIRD WIFE
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THE BANANA SPLIT Chris Christie's twin sister, Misty Christie, makes her big screen debut in a big way in a serious film about a serious subject. After being stuck in traffic for five hours on a New Jersey toll bridge a Girl Scout leader eats more than her entire girl scout troop while trying desperately to cope with a massive anxiety attack.
THE BANANA SPLIT
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BIG SHORT DANISH GIRL She's neither big nor short and she certainly isn't a Danish transgender activist but her customers all love her like their own family. Every morning for fourteen years at Hillary's Hofbrau in Hattiesburg, Mississippi she's been opening those same kitchen doors with a plate of danish and a smile as bright as day.
BIG SHORT DANISH GIRL
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BORDER WARS An immigrant father and son immigrant smuggling team specializing at smuggling Cuban baseball players into the United States are apprehended at the border near Tijuana, Mexico. Immigration officials are stunned and disappointed when the pair are released to the Sheldon Adelson Las Vegas luxury limousine shuttle.
BORDER WARS
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MAD MAX - KID TABLE Furious over their scenes being left on the cutting room floor two underemployed movie extras and a Hollywood stuntman steal a truck full of Oscar nominated movie props and memorabilia and head for an abandoned travel trailer hideout on ten acres of desert land near Lake Los Angeles in the Antelope Valley.
MAD MAX - KID TABLE
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THE RAT PACK IS BACK In it's 40th year this cabaret style production changes only because the cast of celebrity impersonators keeps changing. Remaining are an endless stream of tasteless racist jokes and all women are dumb broads. This nostalgia is a nightmare and this supposedly classy era now looks more assy than classy.
THE RAT PACK IS BACK
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BIRDMAN OR THE UNEXPECTED BURDEN OF IGNORANCE Nicolas Cage gets facial reconstruction after fire damage and grafts a famous face. He leads a land grab for ranchers special ops secret mission and hires an armed posse who then occupy federal buildings until his plan goes bad when septic pumper trucks suspend service.
BIRDMAN OR THE UNEXPECTED BURDEN OF IGNORANCE
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TOP BUN EPISODE 5 - 2016 TRUMP STREET After circling the globe in only four episodes Top Bun and his beautiful Slavokian assistant kick back at 2016 Trump Street in a gated seaside Florida luxury enclave. The pair discuss grooming and fitness with the camera mostly serving a voyeur's peephole into where it probably shouldn't be.
TOP BUN EPISODE 5 - 2016 TRUMP STREET
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TOP BUN - EPISODE 4 CHUTZPAH IN CHINA Top Bun convinces China to pay him to build a city equivalent to Sheldon Adelson and Steve Wynn's Island gambling mecca in Macao. Billions of dollars in Chinese wealth is transferred to American billionaires via the casinos at the #1 favorite vacation destination of upper income Chinese.
TOP BUN EPISODE 4 -
     CHUTZPAH IN CHINA
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THE REVENANT Bernie Sanders sought out an award winning director and the result is an amazing performance that may win multiple awards for the late blooming actor. Abandoned, given no chance and left for dead Bernie's character displays an indomitable will power to survive and ultimately redeem himself and his campaign for justice.
THE REVENANT
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IT'S NOT ROCKET SCIENCE! Bernie Sanders plays Albert Einstein but with a twist. Einstein has been re-imagined as a University Of Vermont economics professor and democratic socialist. A epiphany in his twenties leads to Einstein's greatest discovery and he spends the next 50 years of his life trying to convince others of his findings.
IT'S NOT ROCKET SCIENCE
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HAPPY DAYS IN COUGAR TOWN The Cruz played by Ted Cruz finally decides to leave his mother's house in Calgary, Canada and ride his motorcycle all the way to Cuba to visit his father and grandparents. After a small hurricane and alligator encounter his motorcycle develops engine trouble and The Cruz is stranded in Cougar Town.
HAPPY DAYS IN COUGAR
      TOWN
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TOP BUN - EPISODE 3 JIHADI DON Immediately after El Chapo is arrested Top Bun robs El Chapo's biggest cash vault and assumes control of his Middle Eastern illegal drug trafficking business. When some wealthy Saudis try to stiff Top Bun for a heroin shipment he temporarily renames himself Jihadi Don and makes a threatening video.
TOP BUN IS JIHADI DON
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TOP BUN 2 Top Bun picks up a lucrative contract to attend an event at the White House with an accomplice in order to plant listening devices for the NRA. He doesn't kill anybody in this episode but his Slovenkia accomplice's wardrobe malfunction is must see television and allows Top Bun plenty of time to complete his secret mission.
TOP BUN 2 - AMERICA'S NEW POWER COUPLE
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MOLSON CANADIAN The year is 1992 and Young Rafael's love for the game of soccer leads him to a life-changing crossroads. A talented defenseman, Ted must make his choice of playing for either the Canada or Cuba or U.S. National soccer team in the World Cup and thinks it over while watching movies with a case of Molson Canadian.
MOLSON CANADIAN
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JIHADI APPRENTICE Even before his Presidential campaign The Donald had negotiated a deal for an APPRENTICE style television show with Africa's second largest TV network. Local customs and traditions have been embraced as the program airs in multiple dialects depending on the broadcast's location in Southern or Northern Africa.
JIHADI APPRENTICE
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REAL HOUSEWIVES OF TRUMP TOWER Trump is the master of reality television and once again he demonstrates how it's done. The Donald assembles the wives in the penthouse lobby for a scavenger hunt. Having strategically hidden some very valuable and terrific pieces of jewelry the hunt begins with upskirt Melania camera angles.
REAL HOUSEWIVES OF TRUMP TOWER
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TROLL STORY
Marijuana Users Win Elections!
Oregon, Alaska and Washington D.C. join the states of Washington and Colorado.
The big winners are marijuana users in Oregon and Alaska where voters approved the legalization of recreational marijuana. The states of Washington and Colorado who legalized recreational marijuana in 2012. In Oregon adults will now be able to legally possess up to 8 ounces of marijuana in their homes and up to one ounce in public. Similar to Colorado new revenue raised from sales and marijuana taxes for the State of Oregon could be many millions of dollars per year in addition to reduced law enforcement costs. In Alaska adults will be able possess up to one ounce of marijuana and grow three mature plants.
November 6, 2014. Online News Casino
Oregon Legalizes Marijuana
Al-Awlaki's Final Seconds On Tape!
Hellfire missile finds American-born terrorist in Yemen desert.

Anwar al-Awlaki was humming along in his just-washed 1988 Mercedes Benz on the main highway crossing the hot Yemeni desert in the Al Jawf region and talking jihad with Samir Kahn, his webmaster and only other known American-born al-Qaeda terrorist, and then...Byaaaaang! He's soot. President Obama announced the development adding we've run out of influential American-born radical al-Qaeda terrorists to vaporize.
October 6, 2011. Yemen Blockbuster Video.
Anwar al-Awlaki's Final Seconds
TRUMPERY DEFINITION