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 BRETT KAVANAUGH EXCLUSIVE! If everybody else had these stories they wouldn't be exclusive. |
 | BIG BROTHER Brett takes his revised oath of office from Big Brother via big screen depite the President being less than 150 feet away. Brett swears to protect Big Brother above all else and to decide all cases exactly as Big Brother orders those cases to be decided and consder it the rule of God. |
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| THE HEARING Always the class clown it's same old Brett at his Supreme Court confirmation hearing with the Senate. Thinking it hilarious Brett removes his pants while speaking to a female Senator about sexual harrassment at the same time his assistant flashes the white power sign at the TV camera. |
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| CRAPS With a close door order in the Vice President's pocket a casino manager is forced to declare every role of the dice a winner until Judge Kavanugh recoups the $225,000 he owed the casino. Even with the game rigged it took Kavanaugh nearly three and a half hours to win his money back. |
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