The DAILY RACING RAG offers exclusive original content
consisting of illustrated reports on U.S. Presidential Derby contenders and political horse race news of the upcoming 2016 Presidential horse race to the
White House. Until that race begins the Daily Racing Rag feels compelled to pitch new ideas for television series and movies based on political events.
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DAILY RACING RAG BIG SPECIAL
EDITION - FALL previews of new movies in theaters and new TV or online series, special programs and movies! |
| THE INDICTABLES No doubt an obsessive Sylvester
Stallone fan is behind the making of this 98 minute movie drama that substitutes inside the ammo belt riffs off Stallone's Expendables movie franchise to create
the impression of action but the movie wheels of this courtroom justice are actually grinding along in a relatively slow gear. Tensions mount like a human
pyramid as Republican Governors keep getting indicted and investigated in a suspicious flurry of activity reeking of a political plot so diabolically clever as
to suggest confirmation of multiple intelligent design theories. Watching the Indictables crumble in their reckoning with the five stages of grief as their
careers disintegrate it seems for the first time these disgraced Governors become liberated enough to reveal the real people behind their political masks. |
DAILY RACING RAG BIG SPECIAL
EDITION - FALL previews of new movies in theaters and new TV or online series, special programs and movies! |
| TEXAS TRUE BLOOD It's been a bloody 15 years
since Rick Perry replaced George W. Bush as Governor of Texas and many Texans finally feel Vampire Rick has gotten a bit long in the fangs. In the final episode
of this final season of the Texas BBS "We got the sauce" series Texas True Blood Vampire Rick will take to ground Greg Abbott his handpicked successor for the
Texas Governor's mansion. As his maker Rick Perry will leave a huge impact on the new Governor if elected when a brand new series debuts next year with the
working title TEXAS TRUE BLOOD II - NEW BLOOD. |
DAILY RACING RAG BIG SPECIAL
EDITION - FALL previews of new movies in theaters and new TV or online series, special programs and movies! |
| SHARK TANK - REPUBLICAN PRESIDENTIAL CANDIDATES
EDITION This special version of SHARK TANK will only has two episodes which will be aired in the week following the next two regular season series
conclusions. Billionaires want to know if Republican candidates will have empathy for the low down dirty effort billionaires have to put in to make millions of
dollars day after day so this contest requires buying or starting a business and making it profitable by any method possible and after one year from the premiere
episode each candidate will be judged on the performance of their new business enterprise. The contest actually began several months ago with each contestant
required to open a retail store in a strip mall in the independent state of Colorado and the first episode will detail their progress so far.
Rick Perry's steakhouse has proven a little pricey for the neighborhood but Chris Christie's donut shop now has multiple outlets with a minimum wage
workforce and is doing well thanks to an entire state full of pot smokers and coffee drinkers. Rand Paul has cashed in big time on pot smokers who now stay
home and watch movies on big screen 3D. Paul is already known the King of Big Screen in Colorado. Only Ted Cruz went straight after the real cash by opening a
marijuana dispensary, liquor store and premium vodka import/export business all under one roof. With a virtual cash machine, money laundromat and tax free
profits held offshore his only problem is making his books look legitimate enough to receive contest credit. |
DAILY RACING RAG BIG SPECIAL
EDITION - FALL previews of new movies in theaters and new TV or online series, special programs and movies! |
| MADEA GOES TO PRISON This comedy is the
latest movie laugh riot from that franchise character named Madea played by Tyler Perry. The action starts with Madea being held in a Texas prison
after her conviction (on appeal) for beating a persistent Mexican fruit vendor into a coma in a crosswalk with his own bag of cantaloupes. After a series of
classic Madea disputes with the prison staff Madea is assigned a new cellmate with a deep voice and a five o'clock shadow who says her name is Chelsea but sounds
more like a Texas-talkin Darth Vader. Rick Perry who has gone all in with his entertainment career has found his calling as this is an impressive comedy debut. |
DAILY RACING RAG BIG SPECIAL
EDITION - FALL previews of new movies in theaters and new TV or online series, special programs and movies! |
| JAILHOUSE ROCK 2014 Everyone thought Rick Perry
was going to run for the Republican nomination for President but everybody was wrong. Perry had been secretly recording tracks with his favorite pop star Justin
Bieber and has been anticipating the day he can devote full time to music which turns out has always been his first love after hearing Elvis Presley on the radio
as a child. This week Perry finally dropped his secret bombshell and has unveiled his public relations campaign for his new career starting with an
arrest for abuse of power to give him some street cred with the young music buyers. His debut album arrives October 22 and his movie will start showing in
November after election day. |
DAILY RACING RAG BIG SPECIAL
EDITION - FALL previews of new movies in theaters and new TV or online series, special programs and movies! |
| JOINT AGREEMENT The quest for power is a
lifelong game that by comparison makes a marathon look like a mini thong. Rand Paul set out years ago to become pals with the one man who could either
propel him to the Presidency or destroy him and that man is Rupert Murdoch. In a precisely calculated and well timed chance meeting at a Sun Valley resort Rand
accidentally bumps into Rupert and charms the pants off him. Rupert then buys Rand a whiskey and before you know it they're both sloshy drunk at a snowed-in ski
lodge and Rupert's moaning like any married Joe that he's having trouble getting his pecker up for Chinese wife Wendy. Rand then gets Rupert to smoke some medical
marijuana until they're both higher than the hotel helipad. The next day Rupert promised Rand his political support after he saying he went back to the penthouse
suite and spun his wife Wendy round and banged her like a Won Ton wagon wheel. They've been best pals ever since. |
DAILY RACING RAG BIG SPECIAL
EDITION - FALL previews of new movies in theaters and new TV or online series, special programs and movies! |
| FERGUSON SWAT After a fast talking hustler sells
them 120 tons of surplus Iraq era Army gear the local police force in Ferguson starts wearing the gear every day and some folks mistakenly think the town has
been invaded by the Army. But when Floyd the barber fires off a few dozen celebratory rounds from his AR-17 after hitting a trifecta on TVG online wagering the
entire Ferguson police force responds in full military gear in a hilarious debut episode that can herein be referred to as a perfect storm of clusterfuck
cop comedy. |
DAILY RACING RAG BIG SPECIAL
EDITION - FALL previews of new movies in theaters and new TV or online series, special programs and movies! |
| SLUDGE REPORT Steve Drudge has
decided to cash in on the family name and dive into the muck racking political news business by going places his brother Matt hasn't gone or will no longer go now
that he's a fat cat multimillionaire. Steve's first report is an actual report rather than misleading headline links to other peoples reports so at least Steve
deserves credit for that and since the SLUDGE REPORT will air regularly on cable TV brother Steve may be rich soon also. The report features tons of belligerent
speeches and rantings but sheds little light on the real reasons why the combatants are such obstinate pricks. |
DAILY RACING RAG BIG SPECIAL
EDITION - FALL previews of new movies in theaters and new TV or online series, special programs and movies! |
| IF POLITICIANS WERE POETS Today almost all
celebrities are talking in rhymes, tweets and hashtags except politicians. They often don't wish to seem too hip or modern because they all have
conservative constituents who frown on current popular culture. Despite long odds for success this ambitious new show on the new Q&A Channel tries to bring art
and creativity where it normally goes to die otherwise known as the world of politics. Republican Rand Paul is the first politician to
give the new format a try but his rhyming answers sound straight off a karaoke machine and will do little to counter his dubious reputation for habitual
plagiarism in his writings and speeches. |
DAILY RACING RAG BIG SPECIAL
EDITION - FALL previews of new movies in theaters and new TV or online series, special programs and movies! |
| SPAWN OF SHARKTOPUS Ted Cruz and family have
just settled into a family vacation and are creating sand sculptures on popular Galveston Island off the Texas coast when a swarm of baby sharktopi overrun the
beach and eat nearly everyone except Ted and Heidi Cruz. Luckily Ted survives because he is buried in his sand sculpture and Heidi because the film needs her
indispensable reaction shots to the bloody Sharktopi feeding frenzy. Cruz capitalizes politically on the incident by raising funds for his Presidential ambitions
but becomes drunk on bravado by recklessly taking up water skiing through the warm waters near a nuclear power plant where the Sharktopi are known to
feed on the offspring of Crocosaurus. |
DAILY RACING RAG BIG SPECIAL
EDITION - FALL previews of new movies in theaters and new TV or online series, special programs and movies! |
| PARALLEL UNIVERSE In our world on our planet
people are mystified as to how former President George W. Bush is able to skip through life with a happy face painting pictures, riding his bicycle, playing with
toys and even writing a sweet as sugar fantasy book about his dear old Texan daddy. However, in one or maybe more of infinite parallel universes a much darker
"W" is a deeply troubled man haunted by nightmares and hallucinations. Holed up like a hermit George refuses to leave his recreational vehicle flying saucer and
has stopped communicating with wife Laura. Loyal and loving as she is Laura stays with George but becomes sexually attracted to the pizza delivery guy played by
Channing Tatum who can't believe his luck as she's been ordering three times a week and always tips a $50 bill. |
DAILY RACING RAG BIG SPECIAL
EDITION - FALL previews of new movies in theaters and new TV or online series, special programs and movies! |
| THEY CALL HIM FANGDANGO Vampires everywhere
have been distraught with their favorite series TRUE BLOOD ending soon but relief in the form of fresh blood has come from producers who refuse to let the
compelling political side of the story die a true death. The scene will shift from Louisiana to a location near Dallas after Texas passed new tax incentives to
bring bloodsuckers and their new movie productions to Texas. The cast will be all new but Ted Cruz has a contract that requires his character to be in every
scene or basically the sole undisputed star of the new show so nobody's gonna take the star off his shiny shine. And just like his character that's why they call
him Fangdango. |
DAILY RACING RAG BIG SPECIAL
EDITION - FALL previews of new movies in theaters and new TV or online series, special programs and movies! |
| CYBERSTATE We know they are alien beings. We
know they are coming. We know they are beaming messages at earth. We know they are traveling in vessels and will be here in less than 27 months. Underlining it's
importance the President tasks the Secretary of State with tactfully breaking the news to world leaders and then reassuring the American public by hosting a
weekly television show discussing the imminent alien invasion in an upbeat and hopeful manner. Despite the public show of confidence and calm behind the scenes
military and public officials are quietly spiraling into hysterical spasms of terror. Science fiction never seemed so real and this show is a sure winner. |
DAILY RACING RAG BIG SPECIAL
EDITION - SUMMER/FALL previews of new movies in theaters and new TV or online series, special programs and movies! |
| REAL LIFE HOLLYWOOD This is the reality
show you've been waiting for. With an ego and influence the size of Jupiter Rupert Murdoch became accustomed to cameras following him everywhere so naturally
he's found a way to profit from what would be an inconvenience to others. Everybody who watches television is likely to find this reality show fascinating as
these characters routinely discuss billion dollar deals the way Kardashians discuss lip gloss. What this addictive new show reveals is that in Hollywood fantasy
and real life are frequently the exact same thing. |
DAILY RACING RAG BIG SPECIAL
EDITION - SUMMER/FALL previews of new movies in theaters and new TV or online series, special programs and movies! |
| TEABOLA
A horror movie might seem an odd choice for Michelle Bachmann's first starring role in a major motion picture but producer and director Charles Koch said over a
gourmet lobster buffet lunch that actress and soon to be retired U.S. Representative Michelle Bachmann was born to play this part and gushed that she actually
became her character even in her trailer on breaks. Koch added Bachmann will likely receive many more offers to play powerful psychologically challenged women.
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DAILY RACING RAG BIG SPECIAL
EDITION - SUMMER/FALL previews of new movies in theaters and new TV or online series, special programs and movies! |
| GOP SPORTS PRESENTS THE 2014 SIMPLETON CLASSIC
Occasionally Republicans get tired of drama and enjoy sports. The back and forth of the Simpleton Classic is always a diversion and the battle for the stupidest
most backward ignorant statement from a Republican candidate is on with a gusto. Celebrity siblings Florida Govenor Rick Scott and conservative hate author and
columnist Ann Coulter host from the Simpleton Country Club outdoor tennis court. The action will include intense volleying of insults, innuendo,
misleading statements and lobbing lies, damned lies and zombie lies back and forth from one side of the court to the other. |
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| DAILY RACING RAG EXCLUSIVE SPECIAL REPORTS! If everybody else had these exclusive special reports they wouldn't be exclusive or special. |
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